The letter to Banneker is a letter addressed to then president Lincoln from a man named Benjamin Banneker. Banneker was a very educated colored man who study astronomy. Benjamin was trying to explain to Lincoln that the constitution should involve and relate to every human being in America, and if it does. Then slavery is unjustified under the law and should be ended. In this letter Banneker explains his belief that we as human beings are all equal in his eyes and thus should be equal under the law.
This letter addressed the hypocrisy within the society and the government at the time. It also addressed the hypocrisy in the fact that the people who created this government that belittles these colored people built this government because they themselves were belittle by the royalty in Europe. They came here for a better life full of freedom and opportunity only to suppress another group of people to do so. Banneker wrote "This sir, was a time when you clearly saw into the injustice of a state of slavery"(Banneker 2). Banneker is saying that the Lincoln once knew how it was to feel imprisoned in life and how he knew then that it was unfair. Banneker says this to remind Lincoln of his feelings of being in an unjust world towards his people so that maybe he can connect that feeling to how the slaves felt when this letter was written. That connection coupled with the mention of the hypocrisy of the constitution because it does not include all men who were created under god are Banneker's arguments for why Lincoln should take a second look on how slavery is a clear and unjust in society under the creator yet it is completely "legal".
I love the fact that your paragraphs are carefully organized and unified. They make the rest of your text flow smoothly. I like the context of your writing because you presented it in a broad manner and anybody that reads this would understand. Also Your use of using and explaining keywords was done effectively. You gave the reader enough background on Banneker's letter so that they were not left out of the loop. This brings me to your use of citation which was nailed beautifully. The only thing that i would suggest you work on is giving directions in your writing. Add phrases in needed sentences such as " in the next paragraph i will discuss" or " first i will talk about" Otherwise everything is great!
ReplyDeleteWell for your introduction you got it completely wrong, as it's the letter FROM Banneker to Thomas Jefferson. This already gives a wrong description to the audience. In your description of the letter in your intro. there are most parts of it but somehow it lacks some important ones as if it was for someone who never read the letter he would'nt really understand.
ReplyDeleteIn your second paragraph I kind of get the idea of hypocrisy you are showing. But your structure isn't really good, you could like make it look better by organizing your ideas, and using different paragraphs for each of them, then it will look more professional. The language you use is vague, i'd suggest you to use a more descriptive language, which would make it easier for your audience to understand about the letter. Your quotation marking is good. But there is lots of improvement to do
I completely agree with Rudy! Well I will actually take it a little bit easier on you.. I see where you are trying t explain the hypocritical acts of Thomas Jefferson, however I believe that more detail should be put into it..I believe I got the idea because I am familiar with the letter that was written by Banneker...take it a bit easier on mine..not sure if I did a good job myself! Overall I must say that your blog wasn't bad.
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